Lebron: Rise

October 25, 2010

Unless you spent this summer living under a rock, or you just come here for the coupon codes, you probably have pretty firm opinions about Lebron’s “Decision”.  I went on the record as against the move to Miami.  In retrospect, that seems quite foolish.  As a sophisticated fan, I should recognize, that all things being equal, quality of life trumps all non-financial considerations.  Instead, I chastised James for taking the easy way out.  Such is the power of the Jordan myth.

Central to the Jordan myth is the trail of ringless superstars he left in his wake.  It’s what separates him from other larger-than-life sports icons.  Jordan, the denier was the alpha, and Barkley, Ewing, Miller, Malone et al. the betas.  Sure, Magic was great, but he let Bird get a chip and vice versa.  In our quest to crown someone, anyone the next Jordan, we’ve had a number of pretenders; some worthy, some laughable.  Shaq and Duncan are disqualified from the discussion because everyone knows the next Jordan has to play on the wing.  Kobe can’t because he lost the PR battle with Shaq…and then there was that whole Eagle business. That leaves one heir, Lebron James.

To fulfill our expectations of next-Jordaness, all James had to do was lead a team, without another true superstar to multiple titles, all the while making it hard for the rest of the league to eat (never mind the fact that Pippen was certainly a top-ten player).  What we failed to realize, was that a) James doesn’t work for us, and b) a title is a title.  Is Mandela’s Nobel Peace Prize worth less than Obama’s because he had to share it with de Klerk (I dare you to find a worse analogy)? Who amongst us, if given the chance to do the thing we love at the highest level, with our friends for a ton of money, and live in some people’s version of paradise, would  insist on doing it on his own…in the snow?  No one.  James made the smart choice.  It just didn’t fit our preconceived narrative.

Fast forward through four months of bitter editorials, admonitions from legends, and endless sports talk radio chatter about “The Decision”, cowardice, tarnished legacies and even the ill-advised introduction of race into the discussion and we get this:

Maybe I should have slept on this before posting.  Maybe I’m not its intended audience, but I just don’t see how this helps.  I can’t be alone in reading this as a giant fuck-you (hi, Chuck).  James doesn’t seem like the outspoken type, so this can’t be an attempt at neo-Barkleyism.  On a Bill Simmons podcast, Chuck Klosterman suggested that Lebron subscribes to a Tupacian “Only God can judge me” philosophy.  I’ve always hated that line of thinking because, well, I’m mad judgmental. Whatever the reason, it’s got me talking.  And thinking.  Good job, Nike.


That LeBron Story You Can’t read

July 30, 2010

On Wednesday, July 28th ESPN ran a piece about Lebron James and friends partying in Las Vegas.  Writer Arash Markazi’s piece detailed an evening tagging along With LBJ, Chris Paul, and the rest of the entourage.  It’s actually pretty tame stuff.  Twentysomethings go to Vegas, something something, naked women, blah, blah.  No drugs, stabbings or Cleveland Steamers (shouts to Delonte).

Then a funny thing happened; The Worldwide Leader in Sports pulled the piece.  Just yanked it offline forever  (of course you can read it in the link from the previous paragraph).  The official story is that the piece was accidentally uploaded.  ESPN says the piece never should have run because Markazi never properly identified himself as a reporter, therefore the principals were unaware that they were acting and speaking on the record.

This begs the question, who did they think he was?  I’m pretty sure I couldn’t just roll up to James and Co. and be allowed to hang for the night.  This just doesn’t make sense.  ESPN claims that no one from James’ management contacted them to have the article removed, and it was pulled for the sake of journalistic integrity.  Forgive me for not believing them.  This is a guy who got dunked on at a basketball camp, and had (almost) all videos of the incident confiscated.

Photo:  Yahoo

Assessing the free-agent destinations

July 1, 2010

Now that NBA free-agency has officially begun, it seems as if speculating about Lebron James’ future home is has taken precedence over actual sports reporting in the MSM.  Here at StylePoints, we never report on anything, so this is right up our alley.  Prediction:  He’s going to Chicago.  Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, lets look at each of James’ major suitors.

Cleveland


PROS:

  • Arguably the best city on Lake Erie
  • James already knows the city, system and his teammates
  • Keeps him in his comfort zone (he’s never lived outside Ohio)
  • Small pond.  For all his global icon talk, Bron likes owning the fishbowl.  He won’t have the clout to get Braylon Edwards shipped out of NYC the way he did in Cleveland.
  • He still has the chance to remake that franchise in his own image, the way Jordan did with the Bulls.

CONS

  • Arguably the best city on Lake Erie
  • Old and/or untalented supporting cast
  • Cultural backwater
  • Baltimore – crabs -The Wire- John Waters + Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
  • Culture of losing.  Seriously, that town stinks of futility.

New Jersey


PROS:

  • Probably moving to Brooklyn, which as a borough, is better than 99% of NBA cities
  • The possibility that new Net’s owner, Mikhail Prokhorov is not above making a 100 million dollar under-the-table offer.
  • Hipsters
  • One of the best young bigs in the league, in Robin Brook Lopez
  • Opportunity to bunk with J & B

CONS:

  • Have you ever met a Nets fan?  Neither have I.
  • Has to share the NY market with the likes of Jeter, A-rod, Eli, things to do other than watch sports.
  • Would have to spend a fair amount of time in Newark for at least one year.
  • Living in Jayson Williams’ shadow…big shoes to fill
  • Culture of losing
  • Supporting cast no better than Cleveland’s

New York

PROS:

  • Undisputedly, the best city in the US.
  • Storied franchise and arena
  • The Knicks can afford to sign James and another max free-agent
  • One of the most dedicated, savvy fanbases in the league
  • D’Antoniball
  • Opportunity to bunk with J & B
  • FAO Schwartz
  • The chance to become THE New York Knick

CONS:

  • Most of the stuff I said about the Nets, minus the Newark, Williams, and no-fans parts.
  • Kills my dream of starting “M.V.Lee”chant in the closing moments of a Knicks victory.
  • Those fans will turn on him if he doesn’t meet expectations.
  • His potential free-agent teammate may end up being the alpha-dog.
  • No one on that current roster plays a lick of defense
  • The Knicks suck

Miami

PROS:

  • The Heat could potentially have the cap-space to sign THREE max free-agents
  • Great young coach
  • South Beach  (save your “there’s more to Miami than South Beach” talk.  You and I know that’s all basketball players care about).
  • No one has established himself as the historical “face of the franchise”
  • mini-Dream Team potential.

CONS:

  • That’s Wade’s team.  James needs to win one as the Alpha-dog to take his place among the greats.
  • Hurricanes
  • Gators
  • Jorts
  • “White Outs”
  • Reggaeton
  • The very real chance that that snake, Riley will make Spolestra step down, and coach the team himself.  He’s done it before.

Chicago:

PROS

  • Top-five North American city
  • Talented, young core in Rose and Noah
  • Could be in the position to sign two max deals
  • Schwa, Hot Doug’s, Kuma’s Corner, Alinea, La Pasadita, Lou Malnatis, Tank Noodle, Ethiopian Diamond, and numerous destinations for Chicago dogs, Italian Beefs and jibaritos.

CONS

  • Notoriously cheap owner.
  • The occasional athlete kidnapping.
  • The hawk
  • Chad and Trixie
  • That statue in front of the United Center



Perfection is boring

May 3, 2010

Lebron James, the best basketball player on earth, just won his second consecutive MVP award.  Much like Jordan in the 90′s he probably deserves to win it every year.  Booooring!!

 

If aliens, or an advanced civilization or a supreme being set out to create the perfect basketball specimen, they would create Lebron James.  The league has never witnessed such a combination of size, strength, speed, agility and exclusiveness.  Having seen him in person, I can tell you; the man’s shoulders are approximately the height and width of your refrigerator and he runs the distance of the court in the time to takes you to locate and press SMS on your phone.

None of this is to imply that Mr James is not a cerebral player with finely honed skills, which he clearly is.  He’s a student of the game, and by all accounts a phenomenal teammate.  It’s just that Lebron James is simply too gifted to be compelling.  The first few times you watch him decimate an opposing team by sheer force of will is exhilarating, but repeated viewings fall victim to the Law of Diminishing Returns.  Sure, news footage of a tornado tearing the roof off of a Wal-Mart is exciting, but you wouldn’t want to see it every night, and you most certainly want to root for it.

Homerism aside, who’s more fun to root for, a force of nature like James or a spindly gunner who creates from insane angles with a millimeter of daylight like this guy?

Americans like their heroes larger than life, which is one of the reasons soccer will never take hold here*.  At the same time, we want to see some level of vulnerability, some imperfection.  Floyd Mayweather Jr’s comeback after getting rocked in round 2 of his fight with Shane Mosley will probably win him more fans than all of his previous flawless victories.

 

In order to be truly compelling, James needs some chinks in his armor…something that shows humanity, like Jordan’s baseball or gambling.  Batman will always be more fascinating than Superman.

*Full post coming later.


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